Finally got word that the tombstone we bought for our mom and dad’s plot was engraved and has been installed at the grave site.

We were all going to take dad up to see it but decided that maybe it would be better to make the 2 hour drive on a non-holiday. That way we could all enjoy the day off.

Still am amazed that a hand-carved angel tombstone that probably weighs 300+ pounds ended up in a small Kansas farm town. I wonder what the Chinese sculptor thought about releasing the angel from the stone. Did they think about the person it was for or was it just another job?

When I was running tonight my mind, as usual, was bouncing all around. Somewhere in the flotsam and jetsam of thoughts my dog Marley came to mind. He’s the exact opposite of my other black dog.

We named him Marley because he’s a Rasta dog. Cool and easy going. He’s a very old black dog. He will turn 17 this July. I’ve never had a dog this old. For the last three years it was in the back of my mind that this will be his last Thanksgiving, Christmas, Winter, Spring, etc. but it never was. We should have named him Timex.

Last night I picked up my dad and brought him home for dinner. I used to cringe every time I’d walk dad through my garage and into my house as the garage has many of the tools that used to be his. It’s pretty common for children to have enormous guilt over placing their parents in a nursing home especially when they’re still cognizant enough to know they’re loosing so much and can’t do anything to stop it. It doesn’t matter that it’s the right thing to do. It just hurts and you have to keep repeating the mantra “I love them and it’s for their own good.”

In case you missed last Wednesday’s airing of the PBS documentary Depression, Out of the Shadows, you can watch it online at http://www.pbs.org/

Their website has a lot of information about depression as well as links to other sites that are valuable resources for those walking their own black dog of depression, or those that just want to understand it better.

A key part of the TLC program is ‘Flow’ activities. Those things we do that we enjoy and become absorbed in - lost in - to the point where we loose track of time. In a sense they are timeless activities. It can be anything from work to play, sports, music, art, games, reading, meditation, etc. Just about anything.

I’ve been meaning to write about getting into ‘flow’ activities when I came across this very well-written article. I don’t know that I could explain it any better.

Finding Flow

Here’s another good resource for articles on depression

Just a reminder that PBS is showing the following tonight.

“DEPRESSION: OUT OF THE SHADOWS” TO PREMIERE ON PBS MAY 21

Comprehensive Look at Depressive Disorders Focuses on Individual Experiences – Including a CEO, a Successful Entrepreneur, a Gang Member and a Journalist – Along with Leading Medical Experts
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Documentary to Promote Dialogue on Depression Through Public Awareness Campaign in Partnership with the National Alliance on Mental Illness and YMCA of the USA
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Jane Pauley to Host Post-Broadcast Panel Discussion

I have been running pretty consistently lately and also doing 40 to 60 minutes of Tai Chi and Chi Gong. Both of which feel really good to do. As a bonus there’s a good feeling that comes from a sense of accomplishment. When you’re feeling down and don’t want to do anything - above all Don’t Give In to that feeling. Go out and do something.

Although no one thinks they have any, everyone has the same amount of time in the day. Quit making excuses and just do it. No matter how much you don’t want to - do it.

Several years ago I started to attend a local Zen Buddhist center. I’d been interested in Buddhism for a long time and had practiced meditation on my own but felt to really get anywhere it would be best to recieve some instruction from those in the know.

What is Zen? Zen is very simple . . . What are you? ‘Don’t know.’ Zen is keeping this ‘Don’t know’ mind always and everywhere.

After work last night I was feeling a little worn down but managed to force myself to run. It’s much nicer to run when I have more energy and actually look forward to it, but I can’t let my mood dictate when to run. Starting out I felt sluggish & wanted to stop and walk but I managed to push through it instead. By the time I was at the half way point I felt much better and it seemed less like a chore.

Mourning the loss of a good, good friend.

This is the last photo that I have of my best friend. It was taken the year before he died of cancer. I had flown up to see him after he had called to tell me was dying. It was a very cold April in the Chicago area. We had a really good, but all too short, visit.